jim knits

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 23:21:56 GMT

jgdkfhglsdg
done with this
had it since like, sophomore year? yeah. or earlier.

new one

ghostofabicycle

hopefully it's mostly gonna be art stuff instead of my idiotic ramblings :]

friend me if ya want.

general rule

Mon, 11 Aug 2008 01:45:54 GMT

music. the weirder it is, the more i like it.

some things

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 17:01:15 GMT

1. we've been friends for a long time and you have helped me out many, many times. i would try and do the same, but you never seem to open up to anyone. i love you dearly but i'm afraid something will happen and we'll go our seperate ways.

2. it aches to think of you. you are the first real friend i've ever had and you will be my best friend until everything falls apart. i haven't seen you in over 6 months; i've only talked to you here and there online. it upsets me terribly to know i am the one who keeps in contact with you the most because i don't do it as much as i wish i could, and you are an amazing person and always seemed to be friends with everyone. loving you comes easily because of the impact you had on my life. whatever you do i'll be proud of you. there are no mistakes, only experiences. go where ever you like but i will always be waiting for you.

3. you would be the perfect lover but seeing as that won't ever happen outside of my dreams, i will settle for you being my most amazing and one of my greatest friends. everything about you screams beautiful. your physical appearance is only matched by the burning passionate lively amazing wonderfully gorgeous spirit inside of you. also we both love sonic youth and the who.

4. i always fall for enigmas, but at least you have fallen for me, too. i can pry pry pry but i don't think i will ever understand you. you, on the other hand, know me better than i know myself. you always know the perfect thing to say to me to put me at rest. you are also really good at keeping me up at night. if you know what i mean.

5. i worry about you constantly, but you seem to pull through in the end. i think you will grow up fine. pre med? really?

6. have fun in alaska. thanks for changing my life.

7. you are the biggest asshole i've ever met and somehow i still love you. our friendship is based on very hostile ground, and plenty of sarcasm, but you are a friend i know for sure would have my back in a fight, and those are the kind of friends i need.

8. i tell you everything. you know who you are and you know what you mean to me.

9. i can never tell if you have mental problems or you just don't care about me. you've hurt me worse than anyone else ever could.

10. i can hear it in your voice that i mean less to you than everyone else. it hurts.

11. i wish i was filled with the overwhelming sense of love that i have for you now when i was little and we lived together. some girls have cars their daddy's bought them. i'm the only one who has a car she and her dad fixed up together.

12. you are the only thing in this entire world that matters. i love you.

i skipped some important people but i guess i felt i needed to say these things to these people.
although none of them will hear these things.

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 22:48:11 GMT

dear baking gods
yes. i have finally learned that peppermint extract is not a substitute for vanilla extract. i will go buy flour and make cupcakes and PEPPERMINT FROSTING like a good little girl. just don't fuck up my meringue cookies.
love,
jim.

[lol when did i start calling myself jim again?]

Mon, 04 Aug 2008 12:19:57 GMT

Paris, Je T'aime est un film très beau.
my initial thoughts after seeing it were something like goddamn it, i really want to go to paris now. i'll explain a little. paris, je t'aime is a collaboration movie. 18 different directors wrote about 20 minutes of the movie, all taking place in paris. some of it is in french, some of it is in english, some of it is a totally american accented french that drove me INSANE hell i haven't spoken french in over a year and i sound better than that. all of it is beautiful. i wouldn't say this is five stars out of five stars because there is no continuity, and some of the sections are just weird and senseless. like the vampire section. it was so bad, i laughed. a lot.
but my favorite part was the natalie portman-blind guy scene. it was adorable and well thought out and it ended so much better than i thought. i was going to cry but then i didn't. i wish i could have JUST that scene. i'd watch it all the time.
the oscar wilde bit was interesting and so was the one where the muslim girl trips et ma clarks? but i am not a fan of the very very end when they went back and gave you just a shot of each one after you had seen it... lame.
but i recommend it and i will probably see new york, i love you, when it comes out.

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 23:32:34 GMT

i bought four records at salvation army today.

I DON'T HAVE A RECORD PLAYER.

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 11:53:49 GMT

i have the worst fucking blisters i have ever seen all over my feet right now.
this is what i get for wearing sneakers without socks. sneakers with fucking huge holes in the side of them.
i missed my chance to go on a month long trip and end up in chicago.
guess i'm flying in october or something.

speaking of which, i am [still] worried as hell. yes i am insane, muffin.

i woke up at 7 to clean the house and i am fucking exhausted. i'd put on the movie ashley lent me but i'll pass out 10 minutes into it.

i have a mini etch a sketch.

my toe that i jammed has the biggest and grossest blister of all. so that toe is bruised black and purple, weird shaped, swollen, and has a huge giant red shiny blister on it.
i used to have cute feet.

Thu, 31 Jul 2008 17:10:35 GMT

I want a record player SO bad right now. Ashley has one and I want it and I looked through the vinyl at Newbury Comics and I was like oh my god, I need a record player. She got hers at Target for $100, which is not that bad considering it is a record player tape deck CD player radio. I kind of really want a vintage one. I know exactly which album I will buy as soon as I get a record player. In The Aeroplane Over The Sea by Neutral Milk Hotel. It's my favorite album ever currently and it just seems like the perfect thing to listen to on vinyl. Then I will probably buy Live at Leeds, because The Who will always be my favorite band.

Last night I bought Blonde on Blonde, Midnite Vultures and If You're Feeling Sinister. I'm not supposed to be buying CDs but I guess I'm doing it anyways. No Frank Zappa, though. That's a first.

Twiggy told me that I'm an audiophile.

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 16:48:34 GMT

i'm going to STARVE this week. i have barely anything to eat. I need to survive til sunday. i told you my mom hates me.

maybe i'll get twiggy to go out to eat with me tomorrow night. el azteca!

that is cool. i should draw/paint something.

i want cds. i'm not supposed to buy any for a while, but i desperately want to go and get some more beck and sonic youth. even though i don't listen to my sonic youth collection that much. i should. that's what i'll do today. sit through every goddamn SY album i own. :]

i want to make ice cream.

Sun, 27 Jul 2008 11:31:02 GMT

last night i rammed my toe against the door frame in the kitchen and thought i broke it.
which is cool cause broken toes are no big deal.
so i hobble back to the living room, and reach down to see if i can wiggle it without extreme pain.
and then i'm like, why are my finger covered in blood?

so i didn't break my toe but i did get a nasty cut on it.
right now, besides the oozing wound, my toe looks a little bit swollen,
but it's definitely not broken. which is good i guess.

i just thought i'd mention it.
i was kinda excited when i thought i broke it.
broken toes make better stories than extremely stubbed ones.

my hair is STILL standing on end. like http://tinyurl.com/5p8j6b yeah

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 13:42:19 GMT

.....i am slowly getting into country. which i guess is to be expected; i listen to "everything."
when i say country, y'all know i mean folk, right?
i guess i've always been a little into it. bob dylan makes me happy. neutral milk hotel is a little folky.
but now i am looking up different versions of OCMS songs, especially wagon wheel.
and i don't know why i don't own any bob dylan or johnny cash or OCMS...
you know, i first heard wagon wheel [probably, at least that i can remember/recognize] when ryan did a cover of it at Mr. AHS. and i still like his version best.

also, folk lyrics are always fkn awesome. i'm jealous. i haven't written anything in ages, least of all anything decent.

i'm wearing a bandanna around my neck.

moar knittin'

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 23:09:33 GMT

ryan jackson, i want that hat. you are a lucky man.

it'd be cool if he'd call me so we can hang out... maybe i will call him again tomorrow or saturday or something.

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 00:48:56 GMT

so the title of the this livejournal? jim KNITS. and i do. occasionally.

i'm in the process of making my dad some socks.

too bad you can't see her fkn sick bedroom wall behind that. one is green and one is filled with pictures of some pretty kickass stuff.

offer on the house. moving soon hopefully. i wonder if i'd be able to decorate my room where we move... we're renting, so probably not. oh well :[

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:05:04 GMT

my little brother is a genius.

:D

he won the freaking contest thing. his bottle rocket went the farthest. :] :] :] he's gonna grow up to be, idk, a mad scientist, if we're lucky.
you can see him in the video high-fiving everyone and stuff :] yes he got a haircut.

that is all. YOU ARE JEALOUS.

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 03:01:56 GMT

because i always end up talking music on this.

from a list of things to read/listen to/watch before i die, by mr. reed. i scanned it today.

yes i am ashamed that i've never listened to live at folsom prison
but the rest is pretty good.

inspire me.

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 12:17:34 GMT

i have been looking in all the wrong places for all the wrong things.

one day, i will write a screenplay and i will help you find what you are looking for.
[we all ask ourselves what we are the genesis of, but for you, it holds so much more meaning.]

i'm going to bcc and then i'm transfering to mass art. i'm scared, i'm nervous, of course i am, i'm fucking terrified of everything. but for the first time since like, april 07, i am excited.

i kind of want to paint? and that never happens.

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 12:54:51 GMT

i bought the new beck album ahahahaha it doesn't suck, but you know. it isn't fkn awesome like his other cds i own. the best song would be gamma ray, i guess, and that does not compare to girl or e-pro or devil's haircut or where it's at or think i'm in love or any of those other songs that just stick out from the rest of his music. maybe it just takes some getting into, i don't know, but it's definitely not my favorite beck album.

i did buy lumpy gravy [zappa] and in the aeroplane over the sea [neutral milk hotel] and they are both excellent. i had heard them both before so i knew this. i have always had a big big big soft spot of NMH. jeff magnum has maybe the most annoying voice in the history of annoying voices but when he sings it makes you want to sit down and cry about how you cannot evoke such emotion like he can. before buying this album, i had heard it many many times, but i guess nothing compares to buying it yourself and listening to it when you're most comfortable. as of now, i would say that this is my all time favorite album, which pushes the violent femmes out of the way. this will be true at least until i buy marquee moon by television, and they battle it out. television has to be my all time favorite punk band, and if you know me, that is saying a lot.

lumpy gravy is a good frank zappa weird album. there are two songs on it, they are both 15 minutes long, and it is apparently the follow up to we're only in it for the money, which makes sense because there are a lot of the same noises on this album. i think i should've bought like 2 more zappa albums because they were having a sale on zappa stuff, i guess? and i plan to collect all of his albums before i die hopefully.

also: in rainbows is fantastic, i like it better than the bends and ok computer, at least. post is wonderful, duh. window city is weird and quirky and has the best song ever on it: the old hag is sleeping. you can't find it on youtube, I TRIED. absolutely free is still my favorite zappa album.

i talk about music too much.

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 02:33:38 GMT

i love memorable conversation because i love to tell stories
and witty conversation makes for interesting dialogue.

current cds to buy list

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 01:04:29 GMT

1 apostrophe/sheik yerbouti- frank zappa

2 anything by sonic youth

3 69 love songs- the magnetic fields

4 in the aeroplane over the sea- neutral milk hotel

5 ok computer/kid a- radiohead

6 horse- patti smith

7 histoire de melody nelson- serge gainsbourg

8 my endless numbered days- iron and wine

9 loveless- my bloody valentine

10 the greatest- cat power

11 slanted and enchanted- pavement

12 i am not afraid of you and i will beat your ass- yo la tengo

13 the rescue- explosions in the sky

14 richard d james album- aphex twin

15 the eraser- thom yorke

16 imperial bedroom- elvis costello

17 berlin- lou reed

18 double nickels on the dime- minutemen

19 blonde on blonde- bob dylan

20 modern guilt- beck

21 michigan- sufjan stevens

22 future days/tago mago- can

modern guilt comes out tuesday. i don't know if i will rush out and buy it because of my extreme becklove, or if i will wait around and get it later. probably wait.

i am going to weight these from more important to well maybe i will take this off.

most important ones are: sonic youth, frank zappa, aphex twin, sufjan stevens, neutral milk hotel, and the magnetic fields.

semi-important: bob dylan, can, beck, minutemen, iron and wine, pavement, cat power, my bloody valentine, radiohead, lou reed, thom yorke.

i might replace these later but at the moment i feel like my record collection needs them: elvis costello, yo la tengo, explosions in the sky, patti smith, serge gainsbourg.

why do i like cds so much?

eta: and then i added like 10 more cds to the list.... i need to go shopping.

fiyaaaawerks

Sat, 05 Jul 2008 04:08:25 GMT

i narrowed it down from like, 97 to 6 for you.

stories

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 20:11:38 GMT

there is someone i would really like to tell stories to right now
but i can't said person. so i'll tell you, group of probably nobodies and possibly someones.

i guess i should talk about my parents before i get into the finer details.
my mom. my mom is an overall very friendly person. sometimes i call her ditzy which is a little mean but kind of true. she just seems to balance on the surface and not go any deeper. she can't spell and asks me a lot of questions and she likes to go out drinking or karaoke-ing quite often. she teaches aerobics and yoga and pilates and other things. she is a little obsessed with self image but not so much so that she's getting constant botox. just fake boobs. my mom is probably where i get my indecisiveness, my impulsive crazy, and definitely my complete lack in sense of direction. she is the small stupid things in me. pushing on a pull door. forgetting where we're parked. those things. she likes bad romance novels, cookbooks, [although she really fucking sucks at cooking] other how to books, and janet evanovich books [but how can you not?]. she likes salty foods more than sweets and she is the reason i drink diet coke. i'm almost the polar opposite of my mom.

my dad is the epitome of cool. no lie. he's a sort of mechanic; he fixes and sells lawn mowers, tractors, chainsaws, snowblowers, etc. he works on cars in his spare time. namely, his '66 fastback mustang, my baby, and his harley sportster. he is a handyman to the extreme. he build my brothers beds, a canoe, helped me with my catapult, recemented his front walk and HIS ENTIRE BASEMENT FLOOR, releveled his house, etc. oh. he built our deck. it's kind of massive. he's a run of the mill italian man. he has 5 brothers and sisters. they are all mechanic type people. or teachers. or both. my uncle tony teaches automechanics. he's smart. smart smart smart. straight A student material, but like, he didn't have to try smart. all my aunts and uncles are like that. he's funny. witty. clever. i look like him, i have his sense of humor and his love of vintage cars, and a bit of his intelligence and memory. he likes john grisham novels. he reads a lot. i don't know when because he's incredibly busy but he does. i could go on and on and on forever about my dad but he seriously is the epitome of cool. he's like fkn wolverine.

i knew my parents were going to get divorced when i was 8. they had a fight. it was in my room. it was a big fight. i was 8. i don't remember much of it, but when you're a kid, your family is perfect and things suck when you realize that's not true. my parents were too different to stay together and years later my mom admitted that chris was the reason they got married in the first place.

the actual divorce started right before my freshman year. i remember finding some sort of book on divorce in a drawer in the computer desk. it was definitely my mom's. my dad wouldn't read a self help book. i don't know if she put it in the computer desk so i would find it or not. that's a little complex thinking for her. she probably just meant to hide it and did a bad job. no one actually said anything to me until winter. i remember this moment so much clearer than anything that year. in art and culture, we had to write down three of the most important moments in our life, and this was probably my #1. in fact, i can't remember what the other two are.

i don't remember which month. i thought november but i remember some thing about christmas being said. it was cold. it was fucking cold. my dad took me out for dinner. just me and him. we went to memphis roadhouse which at the time was our favorite restaurant. he likes meat. i like meat. they make a good steak. it was cold. we drive there in his truck. [so much shit goes down in his truck, goddamn] he turns it off in the parking lot. we don't get out. he has to talk to me. you know that me and your mother are getting a divorce, right? yes i know. but it never hit me until then. lump in my throat hurts to breath no crying no crying no crying. i nod my head and he asks if i'm okay. yes. yeah. he explains how hard it's gonna be for me. i'm going to move out [eventually. in like, june.] your mom is going to have to get a full time job, so you'll have to watch alex. you're going to be like a mother to him.

i swear to god he said that.

are you okay? yes. i nod. ignorance is bliss i realized it was going on but i didn't KNOW. i was what, 14? why does it feel like i was so much younger? i grew up so much right there. we went in. we ate dinner. it was dark and cold that night. he asked me when my hair stopped being blue [in the beginning of my freshman year, alisha dyed my hair blue, but it only lasted a little while.] and i told him, a while ago, dad. this was probably the height of our conversation that night. neither of us are big talkers, unless it involves making fun of my mother or cars.

and that was it.

i'm thinking too much.

me being pretentious and odd, feel free to skip

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 01:33:42 GMT

i'm crazy and i talk a lot, but at least i'm interesting, right? and at times i say things of value.

i've been going over mr. reed's bucket list [not related to the movie at all] and circling and checking off things i want to read and have read, etc etc.

one day i will write a memoir. i have a list of things to do before i die, and that has been at the top of the list since i was small. write a book.

i have no marketable skills besides being interesting, i guess. and this is the interesting that provokes people to people watch, not what scientists mumble during experiments. only mildly so.

at least i can create in-depth sentences, i suppose.
oh yes. rereading looking for alaska and there was this passage that made me fall in love with words, all over again:

...But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend and I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk, thinking that if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was a hurricane.

[i have A LOT of things to say tonight apparently my brain is in overdrive i am thinking so much i'm afraid i'll get a cramp]: i've decided i'm going to give alex my pink chucks for his birthday. if you know me and you know my brother and you know my shoes you know this is a Big Deal [terry pratchett style capitalization, not random idiocy]. i like shoes. no. i don't know what to say on how i feel about shoes. yes i wear clothes every day [usually] but i wear different clothes every day and it is possible to wear the same shoes almost every day for four years. i'm not going to say how i feel about alex. if you don't know, well, where the fuck have you been? but he likes chucks a lot, and he and i are currently the same shoe size. yes i'm a midget. be quiet. his favorite color is pink. i kid you not, he refuses to cut his hair unless he can dye what remains of his hair pink. he is, totally and completely, my kid brother. those shoes have been through everything with me and mean a lot to me but not nearly as much as he means to me and TWELVE IS A BIG NUMBER. to me. all of the ages he has been so far, while i generally forgot which ones he was, have not been as scary for him to turn. [that's an awkward and possibly grammatically incorrect sentence.] twelve is a huge number. so many monumental things happened to me that year. i grew up. we moved, i "became a woman" [stupid stupid STUPID idiom[is that the right word?]], i suppose that's the year i finally realized chris was not really my brother in a sense, depression really hit me that year. it was a big one for bad things and it was a big one for life changing things. alex will be twelve in september and he will be getting my shoes because he means the world to me. maybe he will go through 12 with much more ease than i did, maybe not. i think it will be somewhat different than all of his previous years whether it's good or bad because i am out of school and i have to do something with my life and i won't be there to mother him as much and yes he has an actual mother but do you see how crazy i turned out? right he needs me. he needs my shoes and he wants them and wow this is long and terrible i'm putting this under a cut i'm rambling sorry. okay. bye?

he told me i was soft. i told him all girls are soft and he said no, just you.

things i like

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 23:14:10 GMT

spacemen deep sea divers motorcycles antique cars those russian bomber hats welding goggles army helmets combat boots [esp when worn with an effeminate ensemble] landline phones mohawks band t-shirts worn thin tights with holes cut in them layered clothing daffodils and black eyed susans raw green beans feedback and music played in reverse curly hair scottish men blue eyes cold mornings hot nights good facial hair photography [only if taken by someone other than myself] slam poetry big cities folk music sleeve tattoos perverted humor classic literature independent films avant garde music denim flannel plaid and knit fabrics anything that will make someone say "what the fuck?" banjos ukuleles harpsichords banjoleles xylophones deep voices high cheekbones charcoal drawings anything homemade unprofessional haircuts big words skeletons comic books big earrings culture feminism and strong women vegetable gardens light rain heavy snow slight breezes my dad the work of andy warhol pablo picasso william wegman matthew barney bjork pete townshend john entwistle roger daltrey keith moon kim gordon thurston moore kim deal black francis wayne coyne beck lou reed john cal maureen tucker sterling morrison nick zinner brian chase karen o and a lot more i can't think of right now dresses and skinny jeans the color green manic panic hair dye buddy holly glasses children's books on the holocaust buddha judaism jesus christ and other religious figures dinosaurs, esp dinosaur comics and t-rex synthesizers broken things old bottles old straws pickle christmas tree ornaments eloquent speakers interesting facial expressions good listeners good ideas salem providence boston new york and attleboro funny lyrics surprising lyrics deep lyrics long hugs from people bigger than me desiree nicole meears <3 brightly colored canvas sneakers rabbit ear television sets tuned to nothing radio shows my cats cds cassette tapes and although i don't own any vinyl records happy thoughts happy music morning people my younger brother paper bags whole foods market cooking vegetarian and vegan meals although i do eat meat paperback novels limeade colored straws big sunglasses asymmetrical haircuts lip rings and meaningful tattoos patterned socks spoken stories baking cookies ceiling fans intelligent hip hop people who smoke cigarettes occasionally short fingernails painted black but chipped polish horn rimmed glasses tank tops from old navy foreign languages i can't speak collections t-shirts not being afraid to be naked strapless bras [yes i like them] hardwood floors painted walls and faded floral wallpaper old school zombie movies science fiction television shows oddly colored lipstick eyebrows that aren't too thin hairy arms on both sexes staying up late talking with someone i'm comfortable with shocking people japanese candy all types of candy actually ice cream from local dairies diet coke [plus!] my great grandmother half melted candles but not lighting candles to get them to that half melted point those new ecofriendly funky looking lightbulbs doing things for extended periods of time for the hell of it writing lists reading lists music snobbery youtube vlogs katamari damacy pokemon for gameboy shag carpet dead grass unexpected horn sections wooden playgrounds intelligent conversation my big italian family barack obama and anything that other people don't like.

you should do a list of things you like. yes, you.

Sat, 28 Jun 2008 15:18:43 GMT

ghost world: story of my life.

too perfect.

ETA: TANK GIRL. why had i never seen this movie before now? oh my god. it is my life. except that it takes place in 2033. yeah.

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 19:56:37 GMT

i'm sick of sitting around doing nothing.